I'll write this as I go along.
Briefing. Make the Plan slightly longer: put the Objectives on the first page and then link to one or two other pages for the background (which is very well written btw.) The link to the RV in the Notes section doesn't work. What is the significance of the red shaded area on the map? The Briefing should indicate whether you are going to lead or be a member of the squad. It should also tell you the composition of the squad, since you don't get it in Gear.
How did I arrive at the insertion point? I would suggest a boat disappearing into the darkness, timed so that just as it disappears the patrol boat arrives. They shouldn't meet though.
If you're after realism then this phase shouldn't be done alone. I would suggest that the whole squad lands togther: you and one other move (of course it should really be a 4 man team) off to do the Shilka, while the others patrol quietly and successfully to the RV.
No green tick when the Shilka goes, though I did get some titletext. In fact I got no green ticks at all, so that needs looking into. (The problem is in briefing.htm, the objectives are not numbered.)
Make your hillpatrols smaller: it makes them harder to detect and more fun to take on if you see them. With 9 loons there you aren't going to shoot - it's very hard to drop 9 before one of them drops you, if only because you'll probably have to change mags.
You need to make it clearer in the Briefing what has to be blown up at the Comms centre. I placed a satchel between the building and the tent and got lucky, but you should mention that the critical stuff is the computer equipment in the tent.
Lose the fire at the exfil point, its unnecessary since you have the boat there to identify the place. Make the trigger area smaller so that you get a little closer. Link the trigger to the player (F2 drag and drop) otherwise you can complete the exfil by sending one of your loons over there.
All this stuff is just nit-picking, overall this mission is great. Couple of other thoughts:-
I would consider an outro or ending cutscene (I know they are a real bore to make) showing the choppers landing successfully. It would help with the sense of achievement.
The RV base is no good, its far too substantial for the circumstances. If you want to have one lose the fire and make the ammo crates specific to the mission, i.e. you can't pick up any new weapons or anything, just replace ammo that you have used. Better still would be to have no base at all: have 4 men land from the boat, one going with you to the Shilka and the other two heading off to do a recce. They would "check out" the Comms base and when you met they would report some stuff like the number of sentries or the fact that the computer equipment was in the tent next to the building.
Timing is I think a little tight: 30 minutes does not give you enough time to do proper recces of the targets or to move tactically across the ground. I did it with 5 minutes to spare, but only by relying on savegames (which I use a lot when beta testing)
There is no medical treatment available for the player. I would suggest that one of the squad is a medic, or if that creates addon problems make a little script to fake a medic at the RV. Alternatively have a hospital at the Comms base, or halfway along the road from the Shilka to the town. (To be fair I'm just sore because I had to crawl most of the way to the exfil ....)
No bugs. Realism ... well each task would have taken a 4 man team who would have been inserted one or two nights previous to the assault.
Oh yes, tanks .... well once I was halfway up the hill I wasn't bothered by them because I knew they couldn't follow me, at least not in time to be relevant. I would be much more concerned by a couple of Spetz Natz teams in UAZs. Also, if you happened to have a battle in the middle it would be virtually impossible to meet the deadline.
Now that I've read Uberminch's opinion I'd agree with everything he said except that I'd leave the insertion point where it is. He is right, it is a bit direct, but I hate long boring marches in so in the interests of fun gameplay I'd leave it.
If you want to improve replayability put placement radii on the patrols' waypoints.
Excellent first mission. Well done.