Just played through the mission so here's my take.
oh, FYI I know you have included the addon but Lester's Invisible Targets
is available from the ED.Overview
Fine, good picture of the Apache.
Instead of "with some cold ones" shouldn't it be for some cold ones Intro
It seems a bit stilted and doesn't quite flow properly.
Voice files are at different volumes.
Typo: "sqaud 2 hours ago"
"sattled up" > saddled upBriefing
Very sparse and could do with filling out a little. It could also be set out better.
"Echo convoy will wait Move to here(link)"
doesn't seem accurate - apart from the obvious error in it. How about something like
Echo convoy will wait here(link) while you clear the town(link)
Alot of what is in the Notes would look better IMO as a seperate section in the briefing for example, as an Intel section.
You don't need a capital "C" for capabilities
"radio to them in" > radio to bring them in
something like that
"5 mission completed" > objectivesMission
After relearning to fly a helicopter in OFP I was all set and headed for the action. I wished I'd had Fraps running because there was this great moment when I was dodging the incoming fire from a Shilka when an AA missile went by so close it would have burnt the paint - it looked cool as....
I couldn't work out if, at the first position, the tank and BMP were supposed to be moving away from me. The Vanguard running back to the main body perhaps.
Anyway, swung back around and my gunner appeared to shoot up the whole of Tyrone before we headed up to deal with the next incoming force.
By now I had perfected the side stepping, terrain hugging flight pattern to keep the missiles and cannon fire from causing any damage. After dealing with these I called in the Ammo truck and advanced to the next objective. This time I managed to get a lock on the Shilka from quite a distance and took him out then had to head back to rearm again as I hadn't allowed enough time for the Hellfires to be replenished fully
It has to be said that this last objective was a bit of an anti-climax and could really have done with more stuff to shoot at.
Once I called in the extraction team I flew back to base.
As I dismounted I got an error message: Script end1 not found
Typos in mission:
"Atlast" > At last
"these trucks get through to our" > trucks trying to get through ??
Capital for November 1 (when boarding helo)
"pasted and charkled" > charcoaled
Score 13600 and time taken 19 mins
You could do with using a capital letter when referring to Alpha squad.
"Job" doesn't need to start with a capital letterSummary
As it stands it's a decent attack mission but it does really need more to kill especially at the end as the three enemy groups are roughly the same size. Build the tension here so the player feels he has accomplished something remarkable.
Maybe we could have to protect the extraction team from a small assault force while the squad embarks. The player should have enough ammo as I would think everyone would need to restock halfway through the mission.